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Vietnamese bride in Singapore: Abused by her husband, but did not dare to ask for help

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After many years of suffering from an abusive husband, not being allowed to leave the house and often starving, Lyly, a 30-year-old Vietnamese bride, decided to leave her bad husband.
Lyly (the character has been renamed) said her ex-husband – a driver about 60 years old, often beat her when he was angry, drunk and losing money.

She shared in English: “I asked him for money to spend in the house, but he always asked:” What do you need money for? Let another guy? “.

Once, he didn’t buy anything for her and their son for a week.

Desperate when there was nothing to eat in the house, she called the police for help. She talked about the violence she had endured. “I don’t know where the market is or where the bus station is. I have no money, no friends ”.

She had taken her son away three times but then returned because her husband promised to change each time. However, he continued to beat her. In the end, Lyly decided “that’s more than enough”.

Currently, she is working as a kitchen assistant. “My son is too afraid of him. All times of violence affect the boy “.

Many foreign brides do not dare to speak up when being abused by their husbands.

Thanks to her shelter, she was referred to lawyer June Lim, who represented her to carry out free divorce proceedings. Lyly has sole custody of his son – who is a Singaporean, 6 years old this year.

A spokesman for the Lawyers Association Pro Bono said that it is very important for the Singapore Government to publicize its stance on the immigration status of foreigners after divorce. This is a “thoughtful and tolerant” approach by the government of this country, she said.

After the divorce, Lyly’s ex-husband canceled her long-term visit visa, but a friend at the church helped her to sponsor her to continue living in Singapore.

“If I don’t have people to help me, I don’t know what to do,” said the woman.

A spokesperson for the Ministry of the Interior (MHA) told The Straits Times that those who are widowed or divorced from a Singapore citizen and have custody of children under the age of 21 are “essentially” allowed to live. stay in Singapore on a long-term visit visa until the child reaches 21 years of age.

“This allows them to take care of the Singaporean here,” said a MHA spokesperson.

These foreigners can also be sponsored for living in Singapore by another Singaporean or another permanent resident who is 21 years of age or older. That means when the child turns 21 years old, he / she can further sponsor his / her parent for a long-term visitor visa.

Foreign wives often keep quiet when they are abused by their husbands, the spokesman said, because husbands often threaten to cancel their wives’ visas and deny them custody if they divorce.

In addition, whether or not a foreigner has permanent residency in Singapore will be one of the main judicial considerations when deciding who the child will live with after divorce.

In December 2018, the Pro Bono Lawyers Association and Ms. June Lim, CEO of Eden Law Firm, started the Leaf Project (Empowerment and Legal Support for Foreign Spouses). .

This pilot project aims to provide free assistance to a spouse who is a foreigner who meets certain conditions, for example with a monthly per capita income of S $ 950 or less.

Lawyers Association spokesman Pro Bono said the association decided to start a pilot plan with foreigners with Singaporean children because it is a “vulnerable” group.

They often depend on their partner for all aspects of their life. They may not have anyone to help them in the face of home violence or a broken marriage.

“They face the risk of being repatriated if the partner cancels the visa extension.”

“This problem is especially frustrating when they have Singaporeans, the children will have to leave the country or separate from the mother – often the main caregiver.”

She also said that many foreign wives cannot afford to hire a lawyer. They are also ineligible for legal aid programs because they are not a Singapore citizen or permanent resident.

In addition to divorce and related issues, these wives face the risk of domestic violence, she added.

In many cases, there are many foreign wives who do not have Singaporean friends. So they turn to charities and religious groups to find a native to sponsor their long-term visa.

Watch more video: The Korean court ruled in favor of the Vietnamese bride

Dang Duong(According to The Strait Times)